Purpose.

Have you ever woken up one morning to discover that--inexplicably and overnight--you have somehow lost all clarity on what in the world your purpose is?

Well, if you have, welcome to my world.  Particularly, welcome to my world this past Sunday.  Crazy.in.my.head.

Luckily for everyone around me, I have matured to the point of realizing: When one is crazy in one's head, turn to Jesus, and wait for Him to uncrazy you.

He does, every time.  And, chances are very good that He will use a sudden and inexplicable circumstance that says: Girl, pay attention.

And then, if you're me, you'll feel very convinced you need to blog about it.

[You were, after all, searching for purpose.  What--I ask you--is more purposeful than a blog?!]

Anyway:

Here I am, setting out on a very purposeful walk on that said Sunday.  Look at the swagger, the joy, the intention behind these steps.  We knew where we were going, and boy, were we excited!

We followed our guide down the path that he'd known for years, when--inexplicably!--we found ourselves...

...in the middle of a massive wilderness.

I--in particular--found myself in a particular kind of wilderness, because the smallest and most vulnerable of our group had attached herself to me as the others plowed on ahead, and did not appear to be in the category of 'gee, I don't mind walking through weeds nearly higher than my head' on this particular afternoon. 

So, imagine my situation.  Here I am, feeling a bit crazy as it is, stuck in a field that someone has led me into with no cooperation on my part, dutifully plowing through sword-like greenery in the wake of a child who is terrified of prickles, and systematically left behind by everyone else.

I ask you. 

But, remember?  I am so mature.  And, remember: I am waiting for the moment of uncrazy!  And so, I kept my mouth shut.  I listened.  I reveled in the peculiarity of my situation, and willed myself to be grateful for it.

Because, speaking of maturity:  What better way to receive uncrazy than 

in the middle of a field that is mimicking how my entire being is feeling on this particular day!?  

[Breathe.  Deeply.]

Anyway, I'm sure you've figured out what's coming by now, 

and you are right:

Since Jesus is faithful even in the middle of my craziest moments, I discovered all kinds of inexplicable things that made me feel Purposeful, in the deepest parts of my soul, as I made my way through that horizon of never-ending and quite prickly foliage, and here are just a few:

A) It takes great skill to walk through a wilderness.

B) There is opportunity for deep comradeship in the overcoming of the challenges.

And,

C) there are surprises to run into along the way.

They might be a tad ugly, but they are awesome in their ugliness.  And, their very inexplicability causes something inside of you to stir, to remember there is more to the world than just you,  and that you should keep your eyes open.

And so, as I listened to the gentle [and slightly amused?] Voice whispering in the deepest places of my heart, I discovered that though my particular purpose was still pretty unclear, it didn't really matter, because my Purpose had inexplicably been restored.  

I said 'Alright God, I hear you.'

[I said: 'I think You enjoyed that little object lesson,
just a bit too much.']

And then, I stopped being crazy, and decided to just be.
In whatever wilderness I happened to find myself.

Making the most of it.

 Milkshake anyone?